Is my cape fluttering?

Scattergories

I called K1 last night to set up her time to come over tonight so I can fix her hair color... she let a colorist do something unfortunate at the salon and now requires corrective color to go back to her natural. Normally I don't like fixing color mistakes, but her hair doesn't look good, at all. [and corrective color is expensive in the salon]

During the conversation, she told me she was contemplating starting a blog... kind of like mine, a little bit of everything and she was looking for a name that wasn't too much of one thing or another.

Of course, that conversation got me thinking about my blog, and intent, and name and all sorts of stuff. I already had the name because I'd bought the domain months earlier with the intent of building a website for fun. Once I determined that I would build a blog until I decided what to do about a website, I just wasn't sure what I was going to do with the content. As editor-in-chief, I anticipated that there would be quite a bit about the lungs, especially during my lung season. But unlike my last blogging adventure, I didn't want it to be THE WHOLE THING. I wanted to leave myself open to explore other material. [Which is why I always put the dogs in the header. They're a huge part of my life. And I'm still digging the fish... I've messed with a new header, but haven't come up with an improvement on the current one yet.]

However, when I contemplated running Blogher ads, I had to pick a focus. I picked health because with a name like Asthmagirl, you really can't go in a different direction! But in truth, I really try to minimize the asthma thing because I think it's just not that interesting [unless you have it and are trying to live with it!] to the general public and my audience is pretty varied. Although, this summer might be interesting as the lungs provide a real contrast in their "good season" compared to their wimpy winter!

I really thought I'd do more with the cooking, but the more I post to my cooking blog, the more I realize that I'm still in a huge learning phase. Coming out of 25 years of production dinners has left me with some good skills and confidence but a lot of space to fill with new ideas and foods. The fact that I never know who will be here for dinner makes things even more challenging! That and I don't shoot food very well, I'm always in a hurry to eat it!

I'm not really a mommy blogger. Not that there's anything wrong with that! But my kids are much older, technically adults and my focus is really adult parenting and not child development.

I'm not really looking for a specific area to focus in, I don't really feel like I need to. And I see a lot of people that are just blogging "life" which is interesting, unless it's my life! And then nothing ever happens! Work... food.... the occasional hike!

For me, I think the hardest thing about blogging is time. Having the time to do it well... I wish I could take more time right now, but with two jobs, sometimes I feel lucky just to get a post up! The best thing about blogging, finding community. I don't think I realized how insulated I was with just family and work until I met so many other people that I wish I knew IRL. I've seen other bloggers say the best thing about blogging is having a place to emote, and while I agree, mostly I think it's the interaction. Because I do so much writing, I have a lot of opportunities to express ideas (although in a technical format). But that writing doesn't produce a lot of feedback and blogging provides that opportunity to comment, to interact. The second best thing is the challenges you find. Making something you'd never made before, trying new products you saw elsewhere... the bloggy world is full of ideas, recipes and recommendations. Who knew? 

So, for Thoughtful Thursday...Did you have a focus when you started your blog? If so, has it changed? For you, what do you enjoy most about blogging?

Asthmagirl out!

PS~ I know I'm all over the place today. The dogs had me up and down all night... another story for sure!

My ribs...

No, I'm not making ribs today....

Last night, TOG and I went downtown to see Kathleen Madigan. http://www.kathleenmadigan.com/

Very funny lady. Very funny. This morning my chest and ribs hurt so badly from laughing myself into an asthma attack.... I took extra medication yesterday but it didn't help much during the performance. However, it is the asthma attack of choice... so much better than having one while hiking at 5000 feet or in the vicinity of a scented oil candle!

In the meantime, I have a serious yen to get out of the house but with the NFL draft this morning, I doubt that we're headed to the mountains. Frankly, with the price of gas, I'm wondering how much heading to the mountains we can actually do this year? Maybe I'd better become accustomed to just working in the yard!

I did take photos of cooking last weekend, but it should come as no surprise that I've yet to post them on the cooking blog! I'll try to get on that today.

In the meantime, I leave you with this photo, taken in Canada with Mt. Adams (I think) in the background. I'm pondering cutting my hair this short right now, which would be the ultimate in stupidity as there's no way I could get it into a decent pony tail while hiking and that means it would lay on my neck and get sweaty. Ick. Right now my hair is down below my shoulder blades thus even a pony tail is on my neck. Please...Someone... talk me out of it quick!

Anxiety, thy name is Asthmagirl!

I've spend some time making changes to the blog this morning, and thus my late post. On the left sidebar, you will note a small link called "Asthma on Parade"! I'll probably try to make this a little bit more prominent but for now it's there. Here's why it's there.

When I met with Bossy and her Posse on Monday, I confronted my age old (well since the onset of my asthma) anxiety of being overtly asthmatic. It was the candles on the table. There were the very polite, sincere questions about my asthma that I had issues answering... so much so that I began stuttering. This caused great anxiety for me because (I realized in that moment) I am still in denial about being an asthmatic. I would like to sit down with a group of fun, creative women and not have asthma, or at least pretend I don't. Can't I get through one evening without coughing?

This is where you respond... "But Asthmagirl... Why did you choose the name "Asthmagirl" if you didn't want people to know you had asthma"?

I know... huh? Because I'm a perverse, anxiety ridden creature that likes to torture herself I guess! Also because I never thought I'd be sitting down at a table of great bloggers and introducing myself as Asthmagirl.  It's hard to pretend you're not going to cough and telling yourself "for god's sake, don't reach for your inhaler NOW!" It's much easier to hide behind the blog and pretend you're reasonably sane!

Ah well... they figured it out! Then they wondered why I didn't address asthma in my blog... that people searching for asthma info wouldn't find any common sense if they found my blog... they'd find dark humor, and talking lungs and pictures of that river in Egypt! And I couldn't think of a single reason why I wouldn't post that kind of basic info.... except for my denial and anxiety and my desire to laugh at my lungs and pretend it's not an issue. Perhaps I would have gotten there eventually, but it's always helpful to have someone plant the idea!

Sigh... I know I have to be patient with myself, but five years of this crap and I'm still dying to be "normal". Ah well, at least I'm consistent. And self awareness is always entertaining especially at one in the morning!

So... as I went through the week, I determined to add such a page to the blog and there it is. It likely will have a low entertainment value to non asthmatics but hopefully it will answer the questions of those seeking answers. And now... I can just say "see the asthma page if you have more questions". It's better than having it tattooed on my forehead!

Have a great Saturday!

Anxiety Ridden Asthmagirl Out!

I don't ride horses...

I love them, have loved them forever... but I feel awkward now whenever the question comes up. No... I don't ride anymore. It's for the best.

My last ride was in 1999 when I went with my sister in law. Great ride, lots of fun. A few days later, my back started hurting. It began to hurt a lot over the next 2 weeks... sharp pain, dull pain, aching pain... I had it going on. Finally TOG takes me to the emergency room and after a scan, they think it might be a kidney stone. Everyone nods... yes, those could account for the pain. Here, take these pills and go pass it. A week goes by with no changes... I have to have a kidney scan (IVP) which will help them see my stones clearly.

The scan.... wait for it.... shows nothing. I'm laying on the table and the head dude is looking at me oddly going "um yeah, you don't have kidney stones". I'm floored. I've read up on it. I now know I'm an excellent candidate (not drinking enough water). Of course I do Buddy, you're just not looking.

Buddy says "we're gonna stand you up and take a picture". Whatever. Hurry up so I can go see the pee pee doctor and tell him I don't have stones. Buddy finishes up, gives me the films and boots me out the door. Across the street TOG and I go, hand the films over to the pee pee nurse and sit and wait. My pee pee doc comes in and starts asking odd questions. Does it hurt more standing up... more on one side, hard to pee... blah, blah. Finally he says, you should come look at the pictures. Huh? Why can't you just tell me?

So he shows me my laying down shots, nothing to see here... move along. Then he shows me the standing up shot and he's showing me where my one kidney lives in relation to my spine. Then he moves his hand over and says "and this is where your other kidney should be". What??? Dude.... it's not there. He moves his hand down and points to my kidney which is about 5 inches lower than the other one. "It's down here".

Apparently, something happened with my connective tissue and the kidney got loose. As my aunt said, it went sight seeing. The urethra between kidney and bladder is folded over and causing pain, the kidney has fallen forward and is laying on my ovary. And it's running at about 25% because blood flow is strained. Pee pee doc says he doesn't deal with this kind of mess, but he knows someone that does.

And that's how I met Dr. P. Lovely man... knows his kidneys. He assured me that I was only the third person in the state to have my kidney drop. He even suggested I go on line and research it. He said it has low documentation because most Buddies don't stand a girl up. It goes undiagnosed and therefore it's very controversial in the kidney doctor world. Most people don't think it exists. His plan was to put the kidney back and restore blood flow. If he were successful, I could keep my kidney. If not, he'd have to go back in and remove it, since it was losing function slowly.

So, he did a butt load of documentation to get my short term disability insurance to pay... then I had to wait 5 weeks (on pain pills) for surgery because he was booked. The surgery itself was 9 hours because he did it laproscopically(sp) with robotic assistance. Instead of a Frankenstein scar, I have two little half inch scars in my tummy and one in my belly button. Dr. P basically sewed my kidney to my spine in order to hold it back in place. Then he had me lay on my back for 6 weeks (on pain pills) so the kidney would scar in place. He said the scar tissue would be more important to stability that the actual stitches.

It's the only Thanksgiving TOG made a turkey dinner while I lay flat on my back! By then, I had a nice addiction going and Dr. P had a plan to get me off the pain pills and start doing tests on the kidney. By new years, we discovered the kidney was functioning at 100% following restoration of blood flow. By February, I went back to work.

There's still no proof that the horse back riding is what jarred it loose... but I'm not taking any chances. Laying flat on your back is not all it's cracked up to be!

On a fun note, at that time K1 was in massage school and I let her take the films in to mess with her anatomy class! It's not every day you see a lazy kidney!

Tomorrow begins the new month in NaBloPoMo which is letter writing. I can only imagine what kind of letters I would have written to Buddy, Pee Pee doc and Dr. P. Do you write letters?   

Response

I just want to take today to list and respond to your comments yesterday which I thought were awesome. I appreciated the feedback on my list and in the course of reading yours kept saying "yeah! great idea!"

1. Election reform
2. Complete overhaul of two party system and electoral college
3. College accessibility for all
4. Disability awareness -not everyone's is visible. [agree- mine isn't]
5. Doctors who respond promptly
6. Peace
7. Professional mother's wage so we can raise our own kids
8. Change how retirement pensions are funded for elected officials
9. Locking up child molesters for life
10. Reducing chemicals and pesticides used in producing our foods
11. Changing how asthma is diagnosed (there's not much of a standard, especially for kids)
12. Require curbside recycling in all communities
13. Require natural cleaners in all public venues, particularly where kids are
14. Re-evaluate free trade agreements that suppress human rights
15. Education reform in which kids are not the losers- special ed kids not able to meet standards "graduate" with a certificate of completion vs. a high school diploma

Wow.... just wow. What a thought provoking list. It makes you wonder if anyone is hearing concerns or ideas like these. I mean these are the things we're thinking and hoping for in our every day lives. They're important. How can they be unimportant in our elected officials eyes?

The last thing I want to share is on education reform. Meg went into detail on kids in special ed not graduating and I just wanted to note that in our state that same thing is based on passing the state standardized test in four areas; math, science, reading and writing.

Y'all know my youngest has a disability... she's been trying to pass this test since 5th grade. Even with "accommodation" like extra time, it isn't going to happen in math. Which is odd because she passes her math classes. Until the state rescinded the time line this year (I think they gave it another 5 years) she would not have gotten a high school diploma because she didn't pass the standardized test. Now to be fair, there are kids without a disability that can't pass it either. As a former teacher, I know that if I test my class and I have a 60% failure rate, it's my fault. I didn't present well, the test didn't reflect the material, I didn't teach in a way that allowed different learning styles to learn... whatever. Our state eliminates chunks of curriculum to teach to this test and they still can't get kids to pass. Giving it another 5 years isn't going to make it better unless you change your curriculum or change the standardized test. But the thought that my daughter could pass all her classes and not get a diploma enrages me. I've contacted the superintendent of public instruction for our state and gotten the official blow off. When your officials don't want to hear you, that's when I get on the reform band wagon and start writing my representatives.

Okay... I'm done grinding on this. Thank you all, sincerely, for telling my about your thoughts. I totally appreciate it! I hope y'all have a great Saturday!

Asthmagirl out!

*Last minute edit... a woman's right to choose. It's so basic, I didn't include it in my list. Mental P just submitted moments ago! Thanks!  

Here's your sign

I think this is the first time I've ever inspired a post for someone else which I'm now going to respond to! You remember this guy?? Scary looking salmon dude with all the signs...?

Apparently Annie at Fried Porkchop thought it was fascinating and got all excited about what kind of signs she would post around the house. Yes, well... I have my own version!

• Rinse the milk cartons. Do not just set them on the counter to acquire scent all day. Ewww...
• Please let the dogs out occasionally. Especially if they're sitting in front of you with their back legs crossed and a hopeful look on their face. This is why we potty trained them
• The dust mop and vacuum are so easy, anyone could use them
• As much as I love cooking, I love eating what other people cook also
• If you wash your laundry, great! Now take it upstairs. It's not cool to have five loads of laundry stacked on the dryer and the dryer full of towels because no one wants to finish the job. I have laundry to do also.
• I am not psychic. If you wanted me to buy yogurt you should have said so. I specialize in purchasing the things that people have specfically asked for.
• Don't touch my camera. Seriously.
• If you watch a movie, put it up. The stack of empty DVD cases and discs everywhere isn't pretty. And no, intending to watch it again is no reason not to put it back in it's case.
• Please don't ask me where your stuff is. If I'd seen it, I would have asked you to put it away. It's hard enough for me to find my stuff let alone yours.
• I'm begging... please clean your bathroom so I don't have to.

That sums up my signage. I admit I have things better that Annie. Folks here do hit the garbage and the potty so you'd think mastering the basics would help them deal with the finer details. Not always!

What would your signs say?

In other bloggy news, Hallie is having a fantastic contest over at her blog this week. Drop by and write a Weiner Limerick to win a gift card to Pier 1!  Yes, Pier !! I hear they have wonderful stuff there! So if you have a way with words, it's worth your time to stop by and WWOW Hallie!

Asthmagirl out!

Sleepy...sleepy

TOG is working long shifts this weekend and not getting home until 2:00am. It's hard to sleep when he's not here. I fell asleep in the recliner with a lap full of dogs and woke up at midnight. Stayed up until I heard him come in.

I'm cleaning my office today. I can't go on like this. I'd take a picture of it, but the camera won't work. Undoubtedly I've mucked up the settings somehow, but it worked the other night when I was taking pictures of Gage. My scanner isn't working from the unit, but I can force it through the software. The unit says the software isn't installed. You would think I could have a break from technical issues since I deal with this nonsense at work all week!

Enough crabbing! It's a beautiful day (which is why I was trying to use the camera) and I'm not sick! So no complaints here! Plus, I'm making sourdough turnovers today! Woo Hoo! The recipe of course, is on the cooking blogge!

Have a great day everyone!

Funky Town

My boss had a saying about choosing your attitude. I'm working on mine right now because I don't want to become too pathetic or frustrated! I'm going to let this out though and you may want to stand back!

I've recently gotten dumped on at work, technologically speaking... pretty much everything that could break or go haywire has done so in the last two weeks at work. I'm sick of the server, sick of the accounting software, sick of people breaking stuff, sick of people sending 20 print jobs to the printer and clogging it up so no one else can print, sick of people calling me (without consulting their trouble shooting manual which I wrote for them and it includes pictures on "how to") because they can't get their email and the issue is they turned off the wireless on their dang laptop. Then they want to know if their laptop screen is too dark (wait for it) ... over the phone. Hello... people! Think! Many of you have worked there long enough to have learned better skills. Take some responsiblity for your own computing. I have better things to do than play 'guess how dark your screen is' or 'guess where I sent my print documents this time'... again.

I must be in a funk of sorts as I usually would be reletively unphased by this level of incompetance.

Work! Why am I talking about work. K2 just came in the door from her nursing clinicals and announced that she has strep throat. Thank goodness! With my brilliant immune system, I should have acquired it by this time next week!

Enough icky stuff. Where is my happy place? Must get happy....

For Pam... in honor of your wish to see Alaska... here's one of my shots of Denail (and Mt. Foraker which you don't see that often) from our trip up to Alaska last fall. We went to check out the old homestead. I can't believe how much it's changed in the last 30 years, but the old cabin was still standing...

We drove the Alaska highway many times, most recently when we moved down to the lower 48. At that time it was still gravel in many places and rather hard on the behind. I hear it's much better now!

PS~ We had a wicked storm come through last night with lots of wind. The chihuahuas would not go to sleep it was so loud so they slept downstairs. We were up late and now up early.... I'm sucking down coffee trying to stay awake. Here's wishing calm weather for everyone!

His and Hers To Do list

Today is still simmering in my brain... It being superbowl weekend, I won't have a lot of free time. There are preperations to make, menu planning with TOG (or a last minute food run to Costco) and house prep. If I had my way however, my list would look like this:

• clean desk in office
• Design and install new banner for blog
• Finish book keeping for 07 and prep for taxes
• clean downstairs
• plan menu for superbowl
• Shop for superbowl menu
• plant bulbs I just bought
• wash dogs
• Make easy dinner Saturday night
• Get up and make breakfast
• Get food going in the crock pots so you don't have to cook later
• Ponder what desserts to make
• Send TOG to the Pub for beverages
• Welcome guests
• Watch three hours of pregame and four hours of football
• Clean Kitchen

Because I have to factor in TOG's preferences, who is a self admitted restless soul, it actually looks like this:

• Wish you had time to clean your desk
• Listen to TOG explain I tunes again- wish you understood it....
• Help TOG put shelves up in his room
• Be talked out of bulb planting
• Be hurried out the door without washing your hair, told to put a hat on...
• Go for a drive up to the mountains to see the snow and terrorize the Chihuahuas
• Come home and wash the dogs
• Try to figure out what's for dinner
• Watch Ninja Warrior and UFC
• Get up and throw the house together Sunday morning
• Rush to Costco with the rest of Puget Sound residents and buy whatever ready-made food they have since there's no time to cook
• Swing by the pub on the way home and get a to go jug of beer
• Watch three hours of pregame and four hours of football
• Clean up kitchen

Not that one is right and one is wrong, just that I enjoy our differences! Either way it's the weekend! What are you doing?

Balancing Act

I'm pretty predicatable. I hate feeling crabby like I did after I posted last night. It makes me seek out the happy stuff just to restore some sense of balance. I don't see how people can go through life being perpetually crabby. Sometimes yes, but for me, I need balance so that even when I tip to the dark side, it doesn't take long to recover the happy, smiling Asthmagirl!

With that in mind, I want to thank Pam at MapperSnapper for the award you see on the bottom left side bar.

Although I haven't known Pam that long, I've come to admire both her photography skills and her sense of humor which is laugh-out-loud funny! Pam's joys in life are many and varied, There's always something on her site that's delightful, humorous, fun or insiteful. To me, Pam is one of those people that quietly flows into your life and you can't imagine that you haven't been friends for years and years. To have Pam create an award for her blog buddies is just like her; creative, thoughtful and inspiring! I have to say though, she's done other things that I found just as touching...

Thanks Pam... Sorry that it took me 2 days to figure out how to install the award on my site. Just a word to the masses; always check your code. It's not as perfect as you think it is! I was *this close* to e-mailing Type Pad when I decided to check the code one more time! Very humbling!

Have a great day!

PS ~ Hey LHGTUTLATSFU! Thanks for the message! Hey K1... Hope you are feeling better. You need to be recovered enough for the superbowl!