Leg Donor and Lava

Asthmagirl took her leg to the surgeon. She very politely informed Dr. U that she was prepared to remove the leg herself rather than continue to fight with it every few weeks. The surgeon stared doubtfully at the leg as she poked the sorest location. She didn't see how it could still be acting up. She was also skeptical of Asthmagirl's theory that there was an underlying pool of lava that kept shooting to the surface. Nevertheless, she determined that she was going to open the leg up to see what was happening.... that day. Asthmagirl reluctantly agreed to bring her leg back in late in the afternoon.

With Girlfriend along for support, Asthmagirl returned to the surgeon's office, mentally prepared for what was to come. While the surgeon, her nurse and Girlfriend bonded over shoes, Asthmagirl was hoping the process wouldn't be nearly as ugly as she feared. Um, it was actually a little worse.

It took 7 shots to numb the leg and Asthmagirl fervently hopes that A: you never have to get shots in an area that is that porked over and B: that none of you heard her muffled yells as Girlfriend held her down and reminded her that breathing was her friend.

Asthmagirl confesses she developed a certain sense of detachment once she could no longer feel the searing pain. As the red haze cleared and air returned to her lungs, she noted that the surgeon was chatting Girlfriend up about what she was looking for and why she was making a larger incision. And for a few moments, as the nurse, Girlfriend and the doctor shared medical observations regarding the abscess, Asthmagirl felt like her only role in that moment was that of "leg donor".

She was jolted out of the surreal moment by Dr. U's quiet exclamation "and there it is"!

There what is? What is it? A dragon? A volcano? A boiling pit of magma?


Asthmagirl might as well not have spoken. The surgeon looked up at Girlfriend and said "you'll want to come see this. Look... see the big hole?"

Color Asthmagirl amazed. Dr. U explains that there is a rather large cyst in the cavity she excised last year. This cyst fulfills it's destiny by regularly filling with fluid and erupting furiously... much like this:


Dr. U says this cyst was not there last year when she cleaned out Asthmagirl's leg. After some ceremony, the cyst was removed and Dr. U held it up so Asthmagirl could see the author of her misery. Asthmagirl confesses, dear reader that she momentarily wished she'd had her camera with her. Not because she would have posted a picture like that here, but because how often would you get to see something like that? Asthmagirl realizes that she's odd... and potentially veering off toward bizarre! Thank you for continuing to visit the blog anyway!

In closing, Asthmagirl wishes that she had not left the surgeon's office quite so quickly once the stitches were in place. Perhaps she would have thought to ask for some pain medication... or at least an ice pack. Cuz damn...  6 hours later...It feels like the lake of fire is alive and well...

Yours in gimpiness (and yet relief that there might at last be resolution),

Puppy 2 

Asthmagirl, Maddie and Cassie