The heat is on...

  1. Do you remember this piece of junk troublesome appliance? The leader of the infamous insurrectionist movement titled "what temperature am I really?"... or as it's known more widely... "guess what I'm going to do to your cookies". For the scholars amongst us, I believe the Latin version is 'depereo cena' or roughly... utterly ruined dinner.


Let us bow our heads and remember what it was to agonize over the intermittent baking function. Let us remember the golden days of yore... the cookies, potatoes, the roasts, the turnovers... Yea verily... the meatloaf as well! Now hold that image in your heart, lift your heads and behold...

The Beowulf Behemoth!!!


I am the Teeth large stainless appliance in the Darkness, the Talons 5th burner in the Night. Mine is Strength Simmer ... and Lust Roast... and Power Broil! I AM BEOWULF!  BEHEMOTH! Oh... and the Latin...'excello fornacalis'= excellent or divine oven! But you knew that!

Who would have thought you could get this worked up over an oven? I immediately came home and baked something! 50 Iron Chef points for those who already saw there was something in the oven in the above picture!


Oh look! Cookies! What a load of fat on my behind surprise! I've had to exist on Mother's Double Fudge for the last week while I dreamed of hot cookies out of the oven!  I realize I'm Geddy giddy... bear with me!

Here's the cooktop!


*Giggly Teenage Squeal*! "That fifth burner in the middle is so cute! He looked at me in history class and I almost dropped my contents"! *sigh* [or in my case, *wheeze*]

I know you're worried... I know you're thinking what in the world has happened to Asthmagirl? She used to be so sane, so predictable... so ordinary... now she's a wild woman! Never fear... I'll recover. A girl can't stay Geddy giddy forever.


I'm just really, really happy to see my new oven. Not baking blows! It's the worst! I can't believe I went two weeks without baking anything!

Hail Behemoth!

Asthmagirl out! NO! Wait! The list!!!

I felt:

  • angry that the oven failed me
  • horrified at the thought of finding a new one
  • resigned at what it would cost to get a "decent" one
  • ecstatic to see the delivery truck yesterday morning
  • anxious watching TOG install it (Dude, he had it going on! As a bakery engineer, this guy knows his stuff)
  • relieved when it was hooked up
  • horrified at the smells it emitted when TOG burned it off
  • thrilled to use it once I got home
  • relieved that its over
  • determined to have it paid off in six months or less

Now I've listed... Asthmagirl out!

*No members of Rush were injured in the production of this Blog entry. Snakes and Arrows tour will proceed as planned.