The Shoe Sergeant

Shoe Sergeant here... taking inventory.

Hey you! New guys! Yes, you! With all the stripes and what not...

New balance 

Yeah! Welcome to the shoe closet. You're down there on the end with her other running shoes, in what we call the "non glamor section." No! To your left.... LEFT. Your other left! Yes, right next to the hiking boots. If you're lucky, you'll get worn a couple times a week. Why?

Because you're totally unlike the last pair of shoes she bought. Meet "the most comfortable shoes in all the world"...


Yeah... It'll be a cold day in November before she gives these bad boys up. Then she'll probably want something like this!

New shoes 

Now your job, new running shoes... HELLO! New running shoes! Pay Attention....

New balance 

Yeah, so your job here is to coordinate with the lungs. Without their cooperation, you'll be sitting in the back of the closet till next spring.

You're going to have to make nice.

Lung shot

Your secret weapon is this guy here...


Without him... she's toast. Now, get busy with those lungs. Be firm! Be diplomatic! Be persuasive!

And hey.... she's got weak ankles... so if you do get her out on the flat track, be careful out there!

Shoe Sergeant out!